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TranscriptEdit

Scene 1:Jon's ApartmentEdit

Veiwer discretion warning is shown. Opening credits roll.

Arbiter is seen watching a Halo 3 machinima called The Adventures of Frank and Joe.

  • Joe: "Hi,Frank.
  • Frank: "Hi,Joe.
  • Joe: "Say,Frank. What say we take the Warthog out for a spin."
  • Frank: "That sounds fun and it sounds like a good idea 'cause it sounds fun."

Frank gets it the Warthog and Joe kills him with a Rocket Launcher.

  • Joe: "[laughs] You got pawned!"
  • Arbiter: "Jesus Christ. These kids can't be serious."
  • Joe: "Frank look! It's the Covenant!"
  • Frank: "Oh crap!"

An Elite is seen running towards them.

  • Elite: "Blarg! I'm an alien and imma kill you with my guns 'cause I hate humans 'cause I'm an alien!

Arbiter grabs a knife and prepares to start cutting his wrist. Chief walks up.

  • Chief: "ARBITUR! imma just had teh graetest ideh evar!"
  • Arbiter: "I've grown sour of your so-called "great ideas". I haven't forgotten about you trading in our Dark Knight tickets that one time to see Space Chimps."
  • Chief: "ull liek tis 1"
  • Arbiter: "Doubt it."
  • Chief: "u no hao a lot of kids maek crappy machinima?"
  • Arbiter: "Believe me, I'm aware."

The Elite is seen killing Frank and Joe.

  • Elite: "Yeah! double kill!"

The Elite teabags them.

  • Elite: "Teabag! I'm an alien!"
  • Chief: "So hao abot this / we start our own mashinima produkshun company?"
  • Arbiter: "Sounds lame. I dunno."
  • Chief: "cum on it'll be fun and our sho will rox0r everybodys bockserz"
  • Arbiter: "I don't have anything better to do I suppose. [beat] Alright. I'm in."

Later they are seen it the kitchen floor with a dry-erase board for ideas.

  • Arbiter: "Take that tie off. It looks retarded."

Chief is seen wearing a neck tie that almost envelopes his head.

  • Arbiter: "Like Mother Teresa meets Bill Lumberg."
  • Chief: "IM TEH PRESIDINT OF @ C0MPANY NAO ARBITUR /  i haz 2 l00k liek a business man"
  • Arbiter: "We're the only ones here. And this isn't a real company."
  • Chief: "shut ^[up] and be thinkign of sum ideas faggot / i f33l liek im doing all teh werk heer"
  • Arbiter: "You haven't written a goddamn thing on the board other than that giant dong you drew three hours ago."

A crude penis drawing is seen on the board.

  • Chief: "i does all teh paparwerk"
  • Arbiter: "What paperwork?"
  • Chief: "for teh akounts adn stuff / and teh NASDAQ / and teh stocks portfolio"
  • Arbiter: "You're just spouting stupid business jargon. You're full of shit."
  • Chief: "no u"

They just sit and stare at each other for a little bit.

  • Chief: "[beat] cummign up w/ ideas maeks meh :( [sad face]"
  • Arbiter: "It's not easy..."
  • Chief: "hao abot instead of coeming up w/ sumthign original we maek a sequel 2 something thats already been maed?"
  • Arbiter: "That sucks."
  • Chief: "does u hav a better ideh?"
  • Arbiter: "...What were you thinking of exactly? A sequel to what?"
  • Chief: "a rly rly awesom mov33 thats left wide open foar a squel /  1 that's just beggign to have one maed"

Scene 2: Seven weeks later...Edit

Arbiter is seen reading a script. It says " The Shawshank Redemtion 2: Taking back New York" by Master Chief."

  • Arbiter: "Not only is this a complete disgrace to the original film but it's quite possibly the most inane script ever written."
  • Chief: "ARBITUR U JUST DUNT UNDARSTAND MAI GENIOUS"
  • Arbiter: "I have the feeling nobody else will either."

Chief is seen talking to three players in-game(without Recon Armor since it was taken away for his cheating previously).

  • Chief: "GENTILMEN / i thank eech of u proffesional aktors from arount teh gloeb / w/ ur halp we will maek artistik vision a reality"
  • XBL player 1: "Is it okay if we film at night 'cause I have school tomarrow."
  • XBL player 2: "Yeah me too."
  • Arbiter: "Dude, you've written like five thousand different characters into this movie. I don't think three actors gonna cut it."
  • Chief: "we'll impr0viez"
  • Arbiter: "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"
  • Chief: "filmmign shud b rappd up in abou 2 munths"
  • XBL player 2: "What the hell are we filming here? Lord of the Rings?"
  • Chief: "shut ^ im not payign u homos 2 complaign"
  • XBL player 1: "How much are you even paying us?"
  • XBL player 2: "Yeah."
  • Chief: "ur faem on teh films rel33s shud be enuff / [beat] GOD DAMMIT / wat do kids want? liek hot weels and french friez and stuff?"
  • Arbiter: "Money. Like everyone else."
  • Chief: "FUCK / get Jon's wallet / c if he haz n e cash"
  • Arbiter: "Go to hell."
  • Chief: "l00k gaiz / ill find soemthing 2 giv u l8r / butt we shudn't worry abot moni3z / our focus shud b on bringign mai art 2 lief / and teh four of us shall maek it so"
  • XBL player 3: "Actually ugh, I'm out. No offense butt this sounds incredibly stupid."

The player walks away.

  • Chief: "FINE / ASSWIPE / and teh thr33 of us shall maek it so"

To be continued...

Credits roll. The end.

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