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TranscriptEdit

Scene 1: Jon's ApartmentEdit

Viewer discretion warning is shown. Opening credits roll.

Chief is seen typing on the computer while he listens to "Trololol". The noise wakes up Arbiter who's sleeping on the couch.

  • Arbiter: "Dude, turn that shit off. It's 6:30."
  • Chief: "nao u know i has 2 get up early to troll teh forums arbitur / i n33d at leest six hours / six hours a day k33ps a trolls frown away / ive been going too easy on teh sonies / they cud use a gud trolling"
  • Arbiter: "Can you at least do without the music?"
  • Chief: "[beat] imma pretend i doesn't herd that / butt i cant sez teh saem for MISTAR TROLOLOLOL / u'd better apolojise"
  • Arbiter: "[beat] Who am I kidding thinking I can go back to sleep? You're never gonna to shut up."

Arbiter gets out of bed.

  • Chief: "hay arbitur wats ur favourite toothpaste?"
  • Arbiter: "I dunno, synsodyne."
  • Chief: "miens Gillete /  its teh best a man can get / hay can u get meh a poptart?"
  • Arbiter: "No."
  • Chief: "wat r u doin?"
  • Arbiter: "Getting a game to play. Might as well."

Arbiter leaves the room and opens the game cabinet.He gets Demon Souls for the Playstation 3. Chief appears behind him.

  • Chief: "THATS AN XBOX GAEM RITE?"
  • Arbiter: "Aaaah!"

Arbiter turns around.

  • Chief: "ur getting an xbox gaem rite? thats an xbox gaem rite?"
  • Arbiter[lying]: "Yes, it's an Xbox game."
  • Chief: "i biliev u"
  • Arbiter: "Then go back to your trolling."
  • Chief: "just let meh c / k?"

Chief notices witch game it is and stares at Arbiter.

  • Arbiter[lying]: "Huh? What's this doing in the way? This isn't what I was looking for."

Arbiter drops Demon Souls and gets Halo 3: ODST out of the cabinet.

  • Arbiter: "Here it is."
  • Chief: "we plehed that last nite"
  • Arbiter: "I know."
  • Chief: "we plehed it foarevers / we just finished 35 minits ago"
  • Arbiter: "I know, but...I just can't stop thinking about that level fifty."

Chief reaches his fist out to Arbiter.

  • Chief: "bro fist"

Arbiter touches fists with Chief.

  • Chief: "u want a pop tart? pop tart foar a tru bro?"
  • Arbiter: "No thanks."
  • Chief: "PRAISE MS / say it w/ meh"
  • Arbiter: "Praise MS."

Chief leaves. Now that he's gone, Arbiter puts away ODST and picks up Demon Souls.

Scene 2Edit

Arbiter is seen on couch playing the game with the Playstation 3 controller hidden under a blanket. Chief is sitting nearby.

  • Chief: "this is 2 werlds rite?"
  • Arbiter[lying]: "No, it's Oblivion."
  • Chief: "OBLIVION YES / ITS OBLIVION ARBITUR / UNMISTAKIBLE / [beat] haz u beet king Gohma yet? the door coed is 3 2 1"
  • Arbiter: "[beat] You're fucking retarded."

Chief sees that the controller isn't plugged in.

  • Chief: "omg w8! dont use wiarless / we probly elektrecuted all teh battaries last niht playing haloz"

Chief gets a plugged in Xbox 360 controller and tries to give it to Arbiter.

  • Chief: "taek this"
  • Arbiter: "No, it's okay-"
  • Chief: "its k / uninteruptted gaeming experience 4 a bro"

Chief removes the blanket and is shocked to see the PS3 controller. Chief points behind Arbiter.

  • Chief: "OMG  LOOK AT ALL TEH HORRIBLE THINGS OVAR THER!!"

Arbiter looks.

  • Arbiter: "What? Where?"

Chief grabs the controller and runs away.

  • Arbiter: "What the fuck?"

Arbiter chases after him.

  • Arbiter: "Give that back! Seriously!"
  • Chief: "LOL / TOOLS OF TEH DEVIL / THEY MUST BE CLENSED OF EVILS"

Chief goes into the bathroom and shuts the door. He tosses the controller into the toilet.

  • Chief: "HAHAHAHAHA / holy crap that wuz ossim"

Arbiter gets into the bathroom.

  • Arbiter: "You son of a bitch! What the hell is wrong with you!?"

Arbiter kicks him against the wall.

  • Chief: "LOL / u mad?"

Arbiter kicks Chief's stomach.

  • Chief: "ow / :'( [crying face]"
  • Arbiter: "Seriously, what the hell!?"
  • Chief: "IT WUS GODS WERK MAI BOY"

Arbiter grabs the toilet brush and starts trying to fish the controller out.

  • Arbiter: "God dammit this is just great."
  • Chief: "lol / 2 bad it wasn't that old retarted model or it wood hav coem flying back"
  • Arbiter: "Shut up."
  • Chief: "PRAISE MS"

Credits roll. The end.

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