|Season 3, Episode 13 (25)|
|Air date||May 30, 2009|
|Written by||Jon Graham|
|Directed by||Jon Graham|
A matchmaking game of King of the Hill on Guardian mysteriously breaks down due to an unknown error, and as Master Chief, the Arbiter and six other players refuse to leave because of fear of losing experience points or other personal reasons, they are forced to mingle with one another. Tempers shortly flare though as each player has a different favorite machinima director and ends up designating a portion of the level to himself, and it's up to the Arbiter to put everything right.
The episode opens up with Master Chief and The Arbiter preparing to play an online game. The first one involves Rockets on Snowbound which delights Master Chief, but the Arbiter vetoes joining and both leave before the game start to Chief's anger. To both of their misfortune, they wind up playing King of the Hill on Guardian with six other players, whom each are paired up with one another.
- mastur cheef = A young fanboy of Master Chief from Arby 'n' the Chief.
- teh arbitur = A young fanboy of The Arbiter from Arby 'n' the Chief.
- GynaCOOLogist = A close-minded, trash talking, foulmouthed fanboy of Darkspire Films.
- Colbert Fan = An accomplice of GynaCOOLogist, who is level-headed and idealistic
- Butt Beard = A fanboy of Rooster Teeth
- FEELS GOOD MAN = A gamer who trolls on anything that comes to mind for "lulz"
Just as the 4 teams converge into battle, a glitch causes the game to freeze, leaving a redish hue over the environment but its players are still able to move and communicate to one another to everyone's confusion. None of them wish to quit the match in fear of losing experience. When mastur cheef and teh arbitur notice their idols they are elated to finally meet them. GynaCOOLogist however is not amused and insults Arby 'n' the Chief, stating that Darkspire Films's videos are better. Butt Beard gets involved and degrades both shows, stating that Rooster Teeth is the best in machinima for introducing the genre in the first place (via Red vs. Blue). FEELS GOOD MAN just insults all of them and their shows, trolling each of them for his own enjoyment. Eventually, everyone splits into groups, each divided over their beliefs that their favorite show is the best in Halo Machinima (minus FEELS GOOD MAN who is watching to troll on everyone.)
As everyone is divided, mastur cheef and teh arbitur try to get everyone to sign petitions to have Jon CJG's name changed back to his more recognizable username "Digitalph33r" with no success, GynaCOOLogist is harassing anyone who does not mention Darkspire Films, Butt Beard is ignoring anyone who does not offer credit to Rooster Teeth, FEELS GOOD MAN is observing the bitterness between players unfold while Arbiter tries to understand why he's trolling, and Master Chief is feeding off of the attention that's being presented to him from mastur cheef and teh arbitur.
Finally having enough of everyone's nonsense, The Arbiter explains to everyone about their flaws in their belief that their favorite Halo Machinima is the best and states to all of them that they are all equally great machinima series' despite that fans cannot get along over competitive beliefs. Touched by the Arbiter's words of encouragement in accepting all Machinimas for what they may be, everyone in the server joins his cause, with the exception of FEELS GOOD MAN, who has been recording Arbiter's speech, degrading its tolerable message to everyone as being "gay." Suddenly, the power and server unfreezes and everyone is back in the game. A massive shoot-out occurs with everyone on the map with Chief emerging "victorious."
Elsewhere in space, it is revealed that GynaCOOLogist and Colbert Fan are actually Todd and Travis with Cortana all playing on a separate console. It's revealed that the trio had been abducted by an alien named Zanthar, who plans on having sex with their butts and eating them all, but had allowed them to play one last game of Halo 3 before doing so. Afterwards, Zanthar (Jon's chin) appears and proceeds with his deed. A disclaimer at the end of the episode reads:
Todd and Travis then had their butts made love to by a big gay outer space alien that look suspiciously like Jon's chin and were later eaten alive.
As the alien had no desire for females, Cortana was later thrown into an escape pod and fired directly into the center of an alien sun.
- Microsoft Sam as Master Chief
- Microsoft Mike as The Arbiter
- Jon Graham as GynaCOOLogist, Colbert Fan, FEELS GOOD MAN, Butt Beard, and Zanthar
- Daniel Laszlo as mastur cheef and teh arbitur
- Microsoft Mary as Cortana
- Main article: King/Transcript
- This episode's continuity is very vague as Arbiter and Master Chief know about their show, Arby 'n' the Chief and that they are characters in it, thus breaking the fourth wall several times. Darkspire Films and Rooster Teeth are also mentioned on several occasions as they are both legitimate machinima groups. This episode also finally reveals the true fate of Todd and Travis in Conflict - Part 1 and Part 2, as well as Cortana after Wedding. This is also the last episode that Todd and Travis appear in, whereas Cortana would return 3 years later in the Season 6 finale, The Reunion, after surviving her encounter with Zanthar as the episode portrays. As such, the canon of this episode is questionable. In one of his blog updates, Jon stated that "that particular plot point was intended as a joke for the most part." and "I felt I was doing a service by disregarding that ridiculous event". However, whether or not the episode is still considered canon is still unconfirmed.
- This is the quote by Jon Graham regard the ending of the episode: "That particular plot point was intended as a joke for the most part, and was written before I started taking the timeline very seriously."
- In the Season 8 extended teaser Arbiter and the Chief are stuck in the Gamma Quadrant 394.6 million billion trillions light years away from Earth, a clear reference to the system Zanthar has taken Todd, Travis and Cortana to before murdering them. Zanthar reappears in the Season 8 episode Triple Fault, confirming speculation that he would make a return appearance.
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