|Season 1, Episode 1 (1)|
|Air date||January 7, 2008|
|Written by||Jon Graham|
|Directed by||Jon Graham|
Master Chief Sucks at Halo 3
- "This is going to be a great relationship. I can tell."
- — The Arbiter
The first episode of a series that is the sequel to the Master Chief Sucks at Halo trilogy. Master Chief is continuing to suck at every game he plays, especially Halo 3, and has become a lonely alcoholic... that is until Master Chief is greeted by new friend that will change his life forever.
Three Xbox LIVE players are in a match of Halo 3. They are stuck behind cover and are being bombarded by turret fire. One of them attempts to escape but is shot down in the process. The other two, desperate on what to do, see a figure walking toward them, and they are shocked to find it's the Master Chief, who asks "wats goin on n this lvl". They explain that they're trapped, and need help. Chief agrees to help them, dodging the incoming fire and manages to snipe one of the players on the turrets, forcing the surviving player to abandon his turret to find the Chief himself. The player is flanked by the Chief, and backed into a corner. Terrified, he asks Chief what he was, and Chief replies loudly, "i r guy who gon t33ch u less0n!", and beats down the player with his rifle. The other two players cheer as Chief comes toward them again. A Bungie employee then appears, stating that Chief has been rewarded with one million dollars and infinite girlfriends for his accomplishments.
Chief is woken up from the dream by the apartment buzzer ring, and then grabs a frying pan and throws it at the wall, forcing the buzzer phone to fall to Chief's level. The man on the other end says he has a package for Jon Graham. Chief accepts before the delivery man arrives. After receiving the package, he finds a small box containing an Arbiter Halo 2 Series 1 action figure. Chief goes back to playing Halo 3, before he hears a loud crash from the kitchen. Scared, Chief goes to the kitchen and discovers that the package is ripped and the Arbiter action figure is gone. Chief grabs a knife, and and challenges whatever was out there to come out, only to be whacked with a frying pan by the Arbiter action figure. Chief asks who he is and he replies that his name is the Arbiter, and calls Chief a "motherfucker". The two then play Halo 3. Arbiter learns that Chief has the Heroic map pack, and says that it isn't that great, Chief and him get into a liberal argument about the map pack, with Chief saying he is too poor to afford the map pack, and with Arbiter saying it was a matter of self preference. Chief starts whining for the controller, and after a brief argument, Arbiter hands Chief the controller. Chief plays poorly, with Arbiter calling out how bad Chief was. Chief eventually gives up and goes away, and Arbiter decides to play. Chief then returns with a frying pan and hits Arbiter. Arbiter then says "This is going to be a great relationship. I can tell" and Chief laughs as the episode ends.
- Microsoft Sam as Master Chief
- Microsoft Mike as The Arbiter
- Jon Graham as Xbox Live players, delivery man
- Main article: Pilot/Transcript
- It would have been impossible for Chief to have gotten a knife from the counter in two seconds. One possibility is that it would be boring watching Chief get the knife, especially as the director had no clue what fans would think of the show, therefore making it as good as possible.
- The Arbiter would have needed something sharp to break out of his plastic package, and, it would have taken him probably 5 minutes to break out without using a sharp object. Also, there is no way that Arbiter could escape from the plastic package in one second. Possibly it's the same case as the latter.
- Chief is shown beating down the enemy player with only one melee attack, although two melee attacks are required for killing a player unless you are standing behind him/her and then attack.
- In the commentary, Jon stated that the player that was shouting at Chief because he's been AFK for a while was "totally unplanned for, but fit the situation." The same player would return in the Premier to Season 8, commenting on the lewd statements Chief said at the time.
- A Director's Commentary version of this episode was uploaded on the 15th of July 2008.
- This is one of the rare occasions in the series where Chief comes in direct contact with a human, the others being in The Movie and Endgame. In later seasons, Arbiter insists that he and Chief should not be ever seen by humans.
Watch the episode Edit